The Pizza Effect

Recently, after a tour of the Abbey (a monastery), my dad, a few friends, and I decided to drive by a pizzeria to grab something delicious.

I got into the queue and eventually, it was my turn. “Hello, sir,” said the attendant, “what would you like?” “Em…. Can I please have a calzone and a can of Sprite? Actually, make it two cans of Sprite and two calzones.” “Well, sir,” the attendant responded, “it will take about 25 minutes to make a calzone….” Given that we just wanted to eat and go, rather than to wait for almost half an hour, then eat and go, I changed my mind. “Alright, please give me one large pizza—no, wait…. Give me two large pizzas with bacon toppings and two cans of Sprite.” Now I know you are wondering what I was going to do with that much pizza. Interestingly enough, Emily, a cute young lady with whom we were riding, was thinking the same thing, with her eyes wide open at me.

As if two large pizzas weren’t enough trouble, I ordered another large pizza, thinking that the two wouldn’t suffice. “Excuse me, sir,” I asked the attendant, “can you make it three large pizzas?” He responded in a rather confused tone: “With bacon toppings on that one, too?” “Yes, please,” I said, thinking that of course I wouldn’t want pizza with no toppings. Perhaps he was trying to delay the imminent disaster.

More so, I was wondering why the attendant was bewildered with my humble request of three large pizzas. After all, I was going to pay for them, and those were just three large “slices of pizza.” As for Emily, she had her eyes and mouth wide open in utter shock this time. She must have been thinking: “Oh my God, is this dude alright? Three large pizzas?” And I am sure, like many other Americans, she must have concluded with the infamous phrase: “What the heck.” Meanwhile, everybody else had a regular slice or two of pizza on their plate.

Soon, the first large pizza was ready. Hmmmm…. My eyes couldn’t believe what they saw; they were shaking in their sockets. All this while, I have mistaken a regular slice of pizza for a large, round pizza. At this point, all I was saying to myself was, “Oh God… I am screwed. Now the second pizza is going to come, oh and heehaw…the third. What am I going to do now?” Fortunately, the attendant was kind enough to give me back my money for the two large pizzas I obviously couldn’t eat.

THE LESSON: It can be costly to assume. Some things work differently in different settings. Thanks for reading.